I actually had this dream the other night, but I couldn't bring myself to type it up at the time. I didn't want to dwell on it for too long, it just scared me. Because of that, sadly, I can't remember many details on what happened in the dream, but a few major points stuck in my mind.
In the dream, both my second-born sister and my eldest cousin were dead. It was extremely frightening, because I don't remember how they supposedly died. I know I wasn't angry at anyone, so it couldn't have been a car wreck or shooting or anything, it must have been natural causes. I can still feel the pain of knowing I would never see them again, and the enduring sadness that felt like it went on for months. Years, even.
I remember being in the dream, not even sure where I was, standing around in someone's living room with my cousin's little baby playing carefree and happy on the floor, not knowing that his mother was gone, and crying because now, what would happen to this child? I asked, out loud, who would take care of him now, would his father be able to care for him? My cousin's mother was now in the room and through her silent stream of tears managed to whisper that she would be taking him home with her.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Why would I dream something like this?! I know I live so far away, and I know I already feel as if I'm missing out on the lives of my family members, but does my mind have to remind me of it so often? And so painfully?
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