Okay this one I really only remember bits and pieces, I'm thinking they were actually from seperate dreams that just ran together.
In one section, I was going camping with my husband Mike and his best friend Chris. We were in a clearing between a ring of trees, and I'm fairly certain we were on our property. We had a tent set up and something... I can only describe it as "evil"... came near us, and there was an overbearing sense of urgency and danger. The guys grabbed aerosol cans and began spraying them on the ground in a large square shape, and somehow I knew it would protect us. Chris even sprayed some on my legs, though it didnt make me feel any better and now that I look back I'm not even sure if that did any good at all. I actually recall feeling somewhat disappointed after he sprayed me down.
That section fades out, and I come into another section. This time, I'm lying in bed propped up with quite a few pillows and covered with at least 3 huge blankets, and my sweet hubby is sitting by my side, holding my hand. I was very sick, and he was telling me that I'll get better soon. His friend Chris walks into the room with a bowl of chicken noodle soup, and a cold Coca Cola, and sits down on the other side of me and asks if I need anything else. My hubby smiles at me, and I ask them to put on a movie. Next thing I know, I'm watching something on my computer screen, though I'm not sure what it was they put in. My hubby lays down next to me and Chris leans back in a chair, and we all relax to our movie.
Yeah, that's about all I remember. Weird.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
All Over the Place
Okay this one was all over the place, so don't worry if you get lost; I felt as if I was lost the entire time I was dreaming it.
When it first began, I was playing a small handheld video game while at what seemed to be a family reunion for someone else's family. It had something to do with raising up a small raptor, and a volcano that was about to explode. You had to gather materials to get you and your raptor to safety, all the while protecting the small villages on each island you ran to during your escape. I began to notice the people around me at the reunion were reacting similarly to the ones in the game, but I was too interested in the game to pay much attention to the real world. There was an asian boy, I don't want to guess his exact country of origin because I don't want to be wrong, but he looked to be about 17 to 19 years old, and he wanted very much to play the game. I was having trouble on a level anyways, and handed it over to him.
It was right then that I officially noticed how everyone around me was acting; there really was something coming, and we had to escape as fast as we could. I knew how to beat this in the game, so I applied my gamer knowledge to the real world and managed to get everyone onto a plane and we took off into the sunset, saving countless lives. Textbook happy ending. Except for the fact that the asian boy still had my video game.
When the plane landed, I was in an airport wandering around for a while, although I don't recall having any destination or even whether or not I was supposed to be going anywhere, I just knew I was at the airport. I needed to take an elevator to a different floor, and rode up with two other girls, one of which was a very pretty asian woman with long black hair that looked like silk, casually pinned up at the top of her head and flowing down her neck. She was very recognizeable, someone you have a hard time forgetting.
A lot of memories that actually took place within the airport are broken and missing from my mind; I actually have no idea what else took place there. All I know for sure is that I saw that pretty asian woman.
The next thing I remember, I was getting into some vehicles with the family that was at the reunion earlier. The same asian boy that was playing my video game came running up with a cookie for everyone, and just before I went to eat mine, I looked at it and saw that it was in the exact shape as the head of the asian woman from earlier! every curve of the cookie, and every line that had baked into it, sketched her perfectly; i could see her face, and the way her hair fell down behind her. I started exclaiming that it was fate, that this cookie could only mean that her and I were somehow tied by destiny, and that I had to go back and find her! Not that I actually did though, because one of the mothers from the reunion clapped her hands, and instantly every stopped what they were doing, got quiet, and quickly boarded the vehicles and sat with their heads down, hands in their laps. So I went ahead and did the same.
I'm not sure where we drove to, how long we drove for, or who I was actually with, but I remember walking into an old bookstore. My friend Dustin was there, and apparently he went there a lot because his picture was on the wall multiple times on a bulletin board they had for the people who donated the most time and money to help keep the store well stocked and running. But for some reason, he kept denying that it was his picture. Even though it was clearly him, cuddling his puppy in his arms. I just shook my head and wandered around the store, with no real sense of direction.
Anyways, that was really the end of the dream. I just sort of "woke up" after that. It didnt make much sense to me, either. Like bits and pieces of a bunch of different stories or something.
When it first began, I was playing a small handheld video game while at what seemed to be a family reunion for someone else's family. It had something to do with raising up a small raptor, and a volcano that was about to explode. You had to gather materials to get you and your raptor to safety, all the while protecting the small villages on each island you ran to during your escape. I began to notice the people around me at the reunion were reacting similarly to the ones in the game, but I was too interested in the game to pay much attention to the real world. There was an asian boy, I don't want to guess his exact country of origin because I don't want to be wrong, but he looked to be about 17 to 19 years old, and he wanted very much to play the game. I was having trouble on a level anyways, and handed it over to him.
It was right then that I officially noticed how everyone around me was acting; there really was something coming, and we had to escape as fast as we could. I knew how to beat this in the game, so I applied my gamer knowledge to the real world and managed to get everyone onto a plane and we took off into the sunset, saving countless lives. Textbook happy ending. Except for the fact that the asian boy still had my video game.
When the plane landed, I was in an airport wandering around for a while, although I don't recall having any destination or even whether or not I was supposed to be going anywhere, I just knew I was at the airport. I needed to take an elevator to a different floor, and rode up with two other girls, one of which was a very pretty asian woman with long black hair that looked like silk, casually pinned up at the top of her head and flowing down her neck. She was very recognizeable, someone you have a hard time forgetting.
A lot of memories that actually took place within the airport are broken and missing from my mind; I actually have no idea what else took place there. All I know for sure is that I saw that pretty asian woman.
The next thing I remember, I was getting into some vehicles with the family that was at the reunion earlier. The same asian boy that was playing my video game came running up with a cookie for everyone, and just before I went to eat mine, I looked at it and saw that it was in the exact shape as the head of the asian woman from earlier! every curve of the cookie, and every line that had baked into it, sketched her perfectly; i could see her face, and the way her hair fell down behind her. I started exclaiming that it was fate, that this cookie could only mean that her and I were somehow tied by destiny, and that I had to go back and find her! Not that I actually did though, because one of the mothers from the reunion clapped her hands, and instantly every stopped what they were doing, got quiet, and quickly boarded the vehicles and sat with their heads down, hands in their laps. So I went ahead and did the same.
I'm not sure where we drove to, how long we drove for, or who I was actually with, but I remember walking into an old bookstore. My friend Dustin was there, and apparently he went there a lot because his picture was on the wall multiple times on a bulletin board they had for the people who donated the most time and money to help keep the store well stocked and running. But for some reason, he kept denying that it was his picture. Even though it was clearly him, cuddling his puppy in his arms. I just shook my head and wandered around the store, with no real sense of direction.
Anyways, that was really the end of the dream. I just sort of "woke up" after that. It didnt make much sense to me, either. Like bits and pieces of a bunch of different stories or something.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Sadness and Loss
I actually had this dream the other night, but I couldn't bring myself to type it up at the time. I didn't want to dwell on it for too long, it just scared me. Because of that, sadly, I can't remember many details on what happened in the dream, but a few major points stuck in my mind.
In the dream, both my second-born sister and my eldest cousin were dead. It was extremely frightening, because I don't remember how they supposedly died. I know I wasn't angry at anyone, so it couldn't have been a car wreck or shooting or anything, it must have been natural causes. I can still feel the pain of knowing I would never see them again, and the enduring sadness that felt like it went on for months. Years, even.
I remember being in the dream, not even sure where I was, standing around in someone's living room with my cousin's little baby playing carefree and happy on the floor, not knowing that his mother was gone, and crying because now, what would happen to this child? I asked, out loud, who would take care of him now, would his father be able to care for him? My cousin's mother was now in the room and through her silent stream of tears managed to whisper that she would be taking him home with her.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Why would I dream something like this?! I know I live so far away, and I know I already feel as if I'm missing out on the lives of my family members, but does my mind have to remind me of it so often? And so painfully?
In the dream, both my second-born sister and my eldest cousin were dead. It was extremely frightening, because I don't remember how they supposedly died. I know I wasn't angry at anyone, so it couldn't have been a car wreck or shooting or anything, it must have been natural causes. I can still feel the pain of knowing I would never see them again, and the enduring sadness that felt like it went on for months. Years, even.
I remember being in the dream, not even sure where I was, standing around in someone's living room with my cousin's little baby playing carefree and happy on the floor, not knowing that his mother was gone, and crying because now, what would happen to this child? I asked, out loud, who would take care of him now, would his father be able to care for him? My cousin's mother was now in the room and through her silent stream of tears managed to whisper that she would be taking him home with her.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Why would I dream something like this?! I know I live so far away, and I know I already feel as if I'm missing out on the lives of my family members, but does my mind have to remind me of it so often? And so painfully?
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Why and When to Travel...
Okay this one was really weird. So... yeah. Just saying. Oh, and its long. So grab a drink and a snack before you read it, because it might take a while.
In the dream:
I was sitting down in my old bedroom in my parents house, with my friend Chris. I was in my computer chair, and he was on the edge of the bed. We were talking about what he was going to do now that his girlfriend had moved to Germany. He said he wasnt sure, he loved her, but Germany was very far and very different. I myself was trying to figure out if I wanted to go somewhere new or stay in Orlando for the rest of my life. Eventually the conversation wore itself out and turned into a game to see if he could take the keychain I was playing with away from me. It turned into a lot of twisting and turning and we ended up very close together, half on the bed and half off of it, with me in his arms and him leaning over me. I think we both realized just how close we were at the same time. We just kinda paused for a moment, staring into each others eyes, then at the same time we pulled away, straightened up, and looked anywhere but at each other. Then I said, "It looks like our minds are made up then. You need to go to Germany, and I think I'm headed to New York."
Flash forward to the train station. Thanks to some amazing high tech head gear, I was connected to Ventrilo wirelessly, and could talk to whoever was on Vent at the time through my headset (which was really just an earpiece, kinda like the CIA). Chris had already left, and was on his way to Germany to reconnect with his girlfriend, and I was getting ready to board a train to New York. Except that for some reason, it didnt feel or look like I was headed to anywhere with a big city; or even anywhere that people travel to often. As a matter of fact, it seemed to be a place out of the way of the rest of the world, kinda broken down in spots, with a very particular traveling crowd (and not one I would have ever associated myself with). I was a bit nervous, and completely lost. There were no signs anywhere, not even in the train station, so I had no clue where to go. Hence the headset. There were 2 people on in Vent at the time: my friend Shawn, and someone else I did not entirely recognize, but felt a strange feeling of attachment too, a sort of fondness that made me think he was like a sidekick; that he was always there to help me out, and had helped me get through countless situations in the past. Well, whoever he was, he was foreign, and although his english was near perfection, he had a bit of an accent and could speak his first language fluently as well. Since he wasnt given a name in my dream, let's just call him Victor (I dont know a Victor in real life, which is why I chose this name).
I was talking to Shawn and Victor in Vent, asking them directions. There was a GPS tracking device in my headset, so they were able to pinpoint my exact location, close enough to even tell me which way to turn down the hall. Shawn was doing something and so he was distracted at the time, so after Victor walked me through the train station right up to where I would board my train, we were passing the time till my train arrived with a fun game. I would ask a random question (usually something like "am I allowed to bring a banana on the train or will they provide fruit for me?") directed at Shawn (who was still distracted) and then Victor would repeat it in his native language. The foreign language would attract Shawn's attention long enough for him to say "Could you say that again? I wasnt listening." Then Victor would laugh and say nevermind, then tell me some made-up thing that Shawn had "said" (like, "Yes you can bring a banana, but they will confiscate any apples or peaches. I know this because last year they took my apples but left me with a banana.") Then Victor and I would just laugh for a while when Shawn caught on at the end of the sentence and asked what we were talking about.
After a while the train pulled in, but we knew that once my train was getting close to it's destination, the GPS and wireless Vent would be lost (no reception whatsoever in "New York"). So the first half of my train ride was all Victor (and occasionally Shawn) filling me in on what I would find when I first arrived, how to get to the closest town, and where I would want to stay. When eventually the signal began to waver, we said our good byes, and hung up. Then I just stared out the window for the rest of the trip, watching a peaceful countryside go by, and time passed.
I arrived sometime in midafternoon, although I can't say for sure just how long I was on the train. I was one of the last few people on board, and only one of two that were getting off at this stop. I stepped out off the train and into bright sunlight... and when I looked around, I saw that this could barely be considered a stop at all. It was simply a small wooden platform, and a smaller set of tracks that instead of a train, held a wooden cart, with a short metal handrail around it. I was kind of surprised, but mostly I was feeling a mix of emotion that I'm not sure I could describe; it was as if I knew I should have expected it, but was anxious about finding out where this path would lead me, although I wasn't scared at all. A bit cautious, yet determined. As I said, I'm not sure I could describe it. When I headed for the small cart, I heard someone call my name. I turned around to look at the second passenger who had gotten off at my stop, only to be completely amazed that I knew him. It was my friend Renee, from Orlando. I had gone to high school with him, and a few years after school had ended I heard he had joined the Army. Here he was, in his uniform, telling me how surprised he was to see me there, and how it wasnt a place he would have ever thought to see me. We walked together to the small cart, filling each other in on the basics of our lives and where they had gone after high school. We got into the cart and started along the tracks (there was a small control box on the front that with the press of a button, it slowly started moving forward, heading into town). He was describing to me his amazing life, and I was really seeing how much he had grown and matured since our teenage years, until he began talking about a crazy ex-girlfriend from the Army. He explained how she was stalking him and he was constantly on the run to escape her... he turned his head to look behind us and starts freaking out about how "She's right there in the second cart! I knew she would follow me here!" When I turned around to look, I saw a second cart with a very attractive woman in it, with beautiful blonde curls and a crazed look on her face. I'm not sure how I knew, but I knew that she wasnt really there. I was simply seeing what he believed he saw. Of course, the part that mattered was that he saw her; he began pulling small bombs out of his pocket and throwing them behind us, blowing up the tracks (and any thought of returning to the train platform). Eventually he sighed in relief, stating that she was slowed down and he could finally relax for a bit, and the rest of the ride was made in silence. Awkward crazed silence, but still silence.
We pulled into town as the sun was setting, and I knew I wasn't going to make it to the "safe" places to stay that Victor had told me about. I looked around me to see exactly where I was, and what was around me, so I could better figure out what I should do. Everything seemed to have a slightly grey cast to it, the streets seemed empty until you looked down the side streets, where small gatherings of people were huddled together, some having heated discussions, some openly having sex against brick walls, still others laughing and smoking who-knows-what. Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at me as I walked past their alley (except the couple against the wall, they just slowed down). The street signs were all brand new though, so I was able to tell where I was and I had some idea of where I needed to be. The farther into town I got, the quality of the buildings got better, till eventually the streets seemed like what you actually expect to see (with normal people, a few cars at traffic lights, and normal sounds of the city). It was full dark by then, and I knew I couldn't continue safely. I saw a large hotel, that looked halfway decent, so I went inside to ask for a room.
The hotel manager was a thin black guy who reminded me of the guy from the Disney show "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody" (if you've seen that, then you know exactly how this guy looked). There were college students all over the place in this hotel, and the black guy seemed too distracted and easily agitated to have much patience with me, and he must have thought that I was just another college girl, because he looked at some papers and told me that the only space he had available was sharing a room with one of the other girls that had already checked in. I wasn't too picky, and not being alone for the night sounded like a good idea, so I agreed. I didn't have to pay anything because apparently the college that all these kids were from had paid for the entire hotel for the night. I headed to my room to see what she was like.
The room, first of all, was very small and very girly. There was a huge bed, with a pile of clothes on it, a mirror that took up almost an entire wall, and a dresser that had so much makeup and hair products on it that you couldnt even see the top of the dresser itself. There were three girls in the room, and just from looking at them, it was obvious that they were drunk as hell. The first one was a bit taller, with short straight brown hair. The second one had medium length brown curls with gold highlights, and the third one I never actually saw her face, because she was always turned the other direction, but she had very beautiful long black hair. The taller girl came right on over, and was very hyper and excited to see me, and I swear she was bouncing more than walking. When she talked, every other word was "like" or "oh my god" and "totally"... and it was driving me crazy very quickly. The second girl just kind of stared at me the entire time with a look that said "I dont really like you, but whatever..." and she kept blowing bubbles with her gum, also driving me crazy very quickly. The third girl kept her back turned, but was constantly grabbing different things of makeup and other "girly" stuff (she did this long enough that I was afraid to see her face when she was done, anyways). The bubbly one kept trying to get me to interact with them, some game she said they were playing where anything you touch you have to share, at least that's how the rules seemed to apply. She seemed disappointed when I didn't want to participate, so to make her happy I picked up the nearest item to me, which turned out to be a can of hair spray. She clapped all excitedly and leaned forward and I sprayed it in her hair, and it made her start giggling uncontrollably. I pointed it to the girl who didnt seem to care much, and shook the can a little as if asking her if she was really playing either, and her look didnt alter at all, so I just slowly put the can down and looked somewhere else. The bubbly girl was starting to get a bit too friendly, so I quickly suggested we go out to dinner or something. All three of them jumped at the idea, and for the kind of girls that they were I was surprised at how fast they were ready. I told them I would meet them by the hotel door, and I began searching the room for my wallet. I looked everywhere and I couldnt find it, and started freaking out, thinking that perhaps I had left it at home. I wasn't going to get anywhere around here without money.
This is where time sort of folds in on itself. See, at this point, although I'm not sure how long I was on the train for, I know that I had only been in the town for one day. But for Chris, over in Germany, it had already been almost six months. It didn't work out between him and his girlfriend, so he left and went back to Orlando. I am not sure how all of that managed to happen during the one day I was in New York (I know I wasn't on the train for 6 months) but either way, I miraculously knew about it, so I knew he was back home. I called him, and asked him to go search my room and see if he could find my wallet. I have no idea why I felt this way, but I was very nervous and embarrassed to have anyone search my room (I dont know what the hell I was hiding in there, but I didn't want anyone to find it). But I told Chris that he was the one person that I trusted to go through my room. Shortly after getting off the phone, I discovered that my wallet had been in my pocket the entire time. I never called Chris back, so I don't know if he found whatever I had hidden, but more than likely I didn't call him because I didn't want to know if he DID find whatever it was.
I went to the entrance of the hotel, where I saw the manager had held up the three girls and would not let them out of the building. I asked what was going on, and he said that they were too drunk to go out, and he didn't want the cops to show up in a few hours saying that there had been an incident and asking why the girls had been allowed out in the first place (as if it was the manager's decision to make). I vouched for them, saying that I was going to be driving anyways, I had not had anything to drink at all, and there would be no incidents. He agreed to let us out, on one condition. First we had to stand in front of the security cameras, and allow them to take pictures of us to prove that we had been there, and the time that we were leaving, so that if we didn't come back after a certain amount of time, he could send out a search party. (This guy went from distrusting us to not wanting us to get hurt almost instantly). We stood in front of the camera, and we could see ourselves in the small viewing screen above the door, and our images on the screen started doing things that we were not actually doing. On screen, the girls looked perfectly sober and I seemed to be the drunk one. My image flashed to that of a very huge human-sized crayfish, and when it changed back, my image was moving over to one of the girls and pretending to have pinchers and snap at her. In real life, she looked over to me and started laughing, and trying to avoid the pinchers that I wasn't actually snapping at her with.
I began to get very disoriented and confused, and started to even feel as if I had been drinking. All the emotions that I had been fighting down ever since making my decision to come to New York all started surfacing, and I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Suddenly everyone that I had met along this journey were all surrounding me, and all talking to me at the same time. One by one I could see and hear each person. Chris was laughing and smiling, and telling me that it's alright, everything is happening the way he hoped and that it was all going to be great, I'll see soon enough. I assumed that he found whatever I was hiding and it didnt bother him at all, and I was ridiculously happy at that thought. Victor was saying something in his native language, and although I didn't understand it, I knew he was helping me. Shawn was laughing at me, saying that finally I had made a mistake, so big that I would never correct him again or he would remind me of it and tell everyone about it. Renee was telling me stories of when we used to hang out in high school, asking if I remembered the "good days". The girls were all hanging on each other, and asking me if I still wanted to stay the night. And the last thing I saw and heard was the hotel manager, telling me that I might have gotten in free this time, but next time, I was going to pay. Oh, and could I please stop trying to attack him with my pinchers.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What it means:
I have no clue, honestly. I have a few ideas on meanings, but I think those will be in the next post, as this one is long enough already.
In the dream:
I was sitting down in my old bedroom in my parents house, with my friend Chris. I was in my computer chair, and he was on the edge of the bed. We were talking about what he was going to do now that his girlfriend had moved to Germany. He said he wasnt sure, he loved her, but Germany was very far and very different. I myself was trying to figure out if I wanted to go somewhere new or stay in Orlando for the rest of my life. Eventually the conversation wore itself out and turned into a game to see if he could take the keychain I was playing with away from me. It turned into a lot of twisting and turning and we ended up very close together, half on the bed and half off of it, with me in his arms and him leaning over me. I think we both realized just how close we were at the same time. We just kinda paused for a moment, staring into each others eyes, then at the same time we pulled away, straightened up, and looked anywhere but at each other. Then I said, "It looks like our minds are made up then. You need to go to Germany, and I think I'm headed to New York."
Flash forward to the train station. Thanks to some amazing high tech head gear, I was connected to Ventrilo wirelessly, and could talk to whoever was on Vent at the time through my headset (which was really just an earpiece, kinda like the CIA). Chris had already left, and was on his way to Germany to reconnect with his girlfriend, and I was getting ready to board a train to New York. Except that for some reason, it didnt feel or look like I was headed to anywhere with a big city; or even anywhere that people travel to often. As a matter of fact, it seemed to be a place out of the way of the rest of the world, kinda broken down in spots, with a very particular traveling crowd (and not one I would have ever associated myself with). I was a bit nervous, and completely lost. There were no signs anywhere, not even in the train station, so I had no clue where to go. Hence the headset. There were 2 people on in Vent at the time: my friend Shawn, and someone else I did not entirely recognize, but felt a strange feeling of attachment too, a sort of fondness that made me think he was like a sidekick; that he was always there to help me out, and had helped me get through countless situations in the past. Well, whoever he was, he was foreign, and although his english was near perfection, he had a bit of an accent and could speak his first language fluently as well. Since he wasnt given a name in my dream, let's just call him Victor (I dont know a Victor in real life, which is why I chose this name).
I was talking to Shawn and Victor in Vent, asking them directions. There was a GPS tracking device in my headset, so they were able to pinpoint my exact location, close enough to even tell me which way to turn down the hall. Shawn was doing something and so he was distracted at the time, so after Victor walked me through the train station right up to where I would board my train, we were passing the time till my train arrived with a fun game. I would ask a random question (usually something like "am I allowed to bring a banana on the train or will they provide fruit for me?") directed at Shawn (who was still distracted) and then Victor would repeat it in his native language. The foreign language would attract Shawn's attention long enough for him to say "Could you say that again? I wasnt listening." Then Victor would laugh and say nevermind, then tell me some made-up thing that Shawn had "said" (like, "Yes you can bring a banana, but they will confiscate any apples or peaches. I know this because last year they took my apples but left me with a banana.") Then Victor and I would just laugh for a while when Shawn caught on at the end of the sentence and asked what we were talking about.
After a while the train pulled in, but we knew that once my train was getting close to it's destination, the GPS and wireless Vent would be lost (no reception whatsoever in "New York"). So the first half of my train ride was all Victor (and occasionally Shawn) filling me in on what I would find when I first arrived, how to get to the closest town, and where I would want to stay. When eventually the signal began to waver, we said our good byes, and hung up. Then I just stared out the window for the rest of the trip, watching a peaceful countryside go by, and time passed.
I arrived sometime in midafternoon, although I can't say for sure just how long I was on the train. I was one of the last few people on board, and only one of two that were getting off at this stop. I stepped out off the train and into bright sunlight... and when I looked around, I saw that this could barely be considered a stop at all. It was simply a small wooden platform, and a smaller set of tracks that instead of a train, held a wooden cart, with a short metal handrail around it. I was kind of surprised, but mostly I was feeling a mix of emotion that I'm not sure I could describe; it was as if I knew I should have expected it, but was anxious about finding out where this path would lead me, although I wasn't scared at all. A bit cautious, yet determined. As I said, I'm not sure I could describe it. When I headed for the small cart, I heard someone call my name. I turned around to look at the second passenger who had gotten off at my stop, only to be completely amazed that I knew him. It was my friend Renee, from Orlando. I had gone to high school with him, and a few years after school had ended I heard he had joined the Army. Here he was, in his uniform, telling me how surprised he was to see me there, and how it wasnt a place he would have ever thought to see me. We walked together to the small cart, filling each other in on the basics of our lives and where they had gone after high school. We got into the cart and started along the tracks (there was a small control box on the front that with the press of a button, it slowly started moving forward, heading into town). He was describing to me his amazing life, and I was really seeing how much he had grown and matured since our teenage years, until he began talking about a crazy ex-girlfriend from the Army. He explained how she was stalking him and he was constantly on the run to escape her... he turned his head to look behind us and starts freaking out about how "She's right there in the second cart! I knew she would follow me here!" When I turned around to look, I saw a second cart with a very attractive woman in it, with beautiful blonde curls and a crazed look on her face. I'm not sure how I knew, but I knew that she wasnt really there. I was simply seeing what he believed he saw. Of course, the part that mattered was that he saw her; he began pulling small bombs out of his pocket and throwing them behind us, blowing up the tracks (and any thought of returning to the train platform). Eventually he sighed in relief, stating that she was slowed down and he could finally relax for a bit, and the rest of the ride was made in silence. Awkward crazed silence, but still silence.
We pulled into town as the sun was setting, and I knew I wasn't going to make it to the "safe" places to stay that Victor had told me about. I looked around me to see exactly where I was, and what was around me, so I could better figure out what I should do. Everything seemed to have a slightly grey cast to it, the streets seemed empty until you looked down the side streets, where small gatherings of people were huddled together, some having heated discussions, some openly having sex against brick walls, still others laughing and smoking who-knows-what. Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at me as I walked past their alley (except the couple against the wall, they just slowed down). The street signs were all brand new though, so I was able to tell where I was and I had some idea of where I needed to be. The farther into town I got, the quality of the buildings got better, till eventually the streets seemed like what you actually expect to see (with normal people, a few cars at traffic lights, and normal sounds of the city). It was full dark by then, and I knew I couldn't continue safely. I saw a large hotel, that looked halfway decent, so I went inside to ask for a room.
The hotel manager was a thin black guy who reminded me of the guy from the Disney show "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody" (if you've seen that, then you know exactly how this guy looked). There were college students all over the place in this hotel, and the black guy seemed too distracted and easily agitated to have much patience with me, and he must have thought that I was just another college girl, because he looked at some papers and told me that the only space he had available was sharing a room with one of the other girls that had already checked in. I wasn't too picky, and not being alone for the night sounded like a good idea, so I agreed. I didn't have to pay anything because apparently the college that all these kids were from had paid for the entire hotel for the night. I headed to my room to see what she was like.
The room, first of all, was very small and very girly. There was a huge bed, with a pile of clothes on it, a mirror that took up almost an entire wall, and a dresser that had so much makeup and hair products on it that you couldnt even see the top of the dresser itself. There were three girls in the room, and just from looking at them, it was obvious that they were drunk as hell. The first one was a bit taller, with short straight brown hair. The second one had medium length brown curls with gold highlights, and the third one I never actually saw her face, because she was always turned the other direction, but she had very beautiful long black hair. The taller girl came right on over, and was very hyper and excited to see me, and I swear she was bouncing more than walking. When she talked, every other word was "like" or "oh my god" and "totally"... and it was driving me crazy very quickly. The second girl just kind of stared at me the entire time with a look that said "I dont really like you, but whatever..." and she kept blowing bubbles with her gum, also driving me crazy very quickly. The third girl kept her back turned, but was constantly grabbing different things of makeup and other "girly" stuff (she did this long enough that I was afraid to see her face when she was done, anyways). The bubbly one kept trying to get me to interact with them, some game she said they were playing where anything you touch you have to share, at least that's how the rules seemed to apply. She seemed disappointed when I didn't want to participate, so to make her happy I picked up the nearest item to me, which turned out to be a can of hair spray. She clapped all excitedly and leaned forward and I sprayed it in her hair, and it made her start giggling uncontrollably. I pointed it to the girl who didnt seem to care much, and shook the can a little as if asking her if she was really playing either, and her look didnt alter at all, so I just slowly put the can down and looked somewhere else. The bubbly girl was starting to get a bit too friendly, so I quickly suggested we go out to dinner or something. All three of them jumped at the idea, and for the kind of girls that they were I was surprised at how fast they were ready. I told them I would meet them by the hotel door, and I began searching the room for my wallet. I looked everywhere and I couldnt find it, and started freaking out, thinking that perhaps I had left it at home. I wasn't going to get anywhere around here without money.
This is where time sort of folds in on itself. See, at this point, although I'm not sure how long I was on the train for, I know that I had only been in the town for one day. But for Chris, over in Germany, it had already been almost six months. It didn't work out between him and his girlfriend, so he left and went back to Orlando. I am not sure how all of that managed to happen during the one day I was in New York (I know I wasn't on the train for 6 months) but either way, I miraculously knew about it, so I knew he was back home. I called him, and asked him to go search my room and see if he could find my wallet. I have no idea why I felt this way, but I was very nervous and embarrassed to have anyone search my room (I dont know what the hell I was hiding in there, but I didn't want anyone to find it). But I told Chris that he was the one person that I trusted to go through my room. Shortly after getting off the phone, I discovered that my wallet had been in my pocket the entire time. I never called Chris back, so I don't know if he found whatever I had hidden, but more than likely I didn't call him because I didn't want to know if he DID find whatever it was.
I went to the entrance of the hotel, where I saw the manager had held up the three girls and would not let them out of the building. I asked what was going on, and he said that they were too drunk to go out, and he didn't want the cops to show up in a few hours saying that there had been an incident and asking why the girls had been allowed out in the first place (as if it was the manager's decision to make). I vouched for them, saying that I was going to be driving anyways, I had not had anything to drink at all, and there would be no incidents. He agreed to let us out, on one condition. First we had to stand in front of the security cameras, and allow them to take pictures of us to prove that we had been there, and the time that we were leaving, so that if we didn't come back after a certain amount of time, he could send out a search party. (This guy went from distrusting us to not wanting us to get hurt almost instantly). We stood in front of the camera, and we could see ourselves in the small viewing screen above the door, and our images on the screen started doing things that we were not actually doing. On screen, the girls looked perfectly sober and I seemed to be the drunk one. My image flashed to that of a very huge human-sized crayfish, and when it changed back, my image was moving over to one of the girls and pretending to have pinchers and snap at her. In real life, she looked over to me and started laughing, and trying to avoid the pinchers that I wasn't actually snapping at her with.
I began to get very disoriented and confused, and started to even feel as if I had been drinking. All the emotions that I had been fighting down ever since making my decision to come to New York all started surfacing, and I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Suddenly everyone that I had met along this journey were all surrounding me, and all talking to me at the same time. One by one I could see and hear each person. Chris was laughing and smiling, and telling me that it's alright, everything is happening the way he hoped and that it was all going to be great, I'll see soon enough. I assumed that he found whatever I was hiding and it didnt bother him at all, and I was ridiculously happy at that thought. Victor was saying something in his native language, and although I didn't understand it, I knew he was helping me. Shawn was laughing at me, saying that finally I had made a mistake, so big that I would never correct him again or he would remind me of it and tell everyone about it. Renee was telling me stories of when we used to hang out in high school, asking if I remembered the "good days". The girls were all hanging on each other, and asking me if I still wanted to stay the night. And the last thing I saw and heard was the hotel manager, telling me that I might have gotten in free this time, but next time, I was going to pay. Oh, and could I please stop trying to attack him with my pinchers.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What it means:
I have no clue, honestly. I have a few ideas on meanings, but I think those will be in the next post, as this one is long enough already.
Friday, July 22, 2011
The Cons of Rain
In the Dream:
We haven't had rain in such a very long time, that when I woke up around what felt like 8 or so in the morning to the sound of rain outside the window, it was like music. I quickly raised the blinds to make sure it really was rain, and was delighted to see that it was indeed, and at a steady downfall at that. I was so excited that I woke up my husband to tell him the good news. He, too, was delighted at the unexpected change in weather. There was just one small problem.
We couldnt tell what time it was. Apparently, as we slept, the storm had caused a power failure. Although the power had come back on, all the clocks in the house were reset (excepting, of course, the microwave, whose clock had still not been set from the previous power outage. I'm quite lazy when it comes to setting the microwave clock). Our TV is broken, and so we have no access to any channels to see the time, and the storm was blocking our satellite reception so we also could not get online to check. Curiously enough, the storm was so thick that even our cell phones lost reception, and were still showing that it was about 1 AM (which, seeing as how we could tell it was at least morning, because the sun had clearly risen at some point, was obviously wrong). As I said previously it FELT like it was about 8 AM, but I find that often times I am off by quite a bit when it comes to guessing the time.
So, without knowing what time it was, all we had to go by was the fact that it was at least morning. As we were rising for the day, it popped into my husband's head that we might want to run outside and make sure there is nothing important out there that really shouldnt be getting wet. We threw on some clothes and boots, and ventured out into the rain, scouring the yard for any power tools or other electronics that need to come indoors. I dont remember if we found any, must not have been too important anyways, but I do remember finding birds.
In the backyard, we had a cage of young pheasants, who were none too happy to be getting soaked to their little bones. It was a carrying cage, so it was small with a wire roof (which meant nothing to shield them from the rain and wind). It was a sad sight to behold; a few of them had already died and the rest were attempting to huddle together for warmth, their feathers all matted together. My husband took the cage and found a safe home for them in a brooder, with a roof and a heat lamp, and all we could do was pray they made it through till the following morning (if they could survive the recovery, they would make it).
After securing the animals and anything that needed protection from the storm, we came back inside, only to find absolutely nothing to do. We were completely cut off from the world, really. No TV, no phones, no internet... luckily we did at least still have power. So we sat back on our bed, my sister still asleep in her room, our youngest still sleeping in his bassinet, and our toddler just waking up in our bed. The three of us laid there, just talking and gazing out the window, for quite a few hours, always checking the phones here and there to see if we had reception yet. It was a very long day, and even by the time many hours must have gone by, the sun was at the same point outside. It still looked as if it was 8 AM... like we were destined to stay cut off from the world together forever. But at least we had rain, which we desperately needed, and at least we had each other.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What it means:
Well, we do need rain very much, so it seems obvious that I'm wishing for rain. However I also know that in a really good storm, our internet goes out until the skies clear up a bit, and occasionally we even lose signal to a few TV channels (we dont have cable, so its just the 10 channels we get on the air). But yes, in actuality our TV is broken, so we cant watch anyways. And yes, we only have one TV in the house that can get any channels. We have a second TV on the backporch that works very well, except its analog and we dont have a converter box. We had a TV in the bedroom, but we turned it into a computer monitor instead since we never actually watched TV when we were in the bedroom anyways. There's only a few shows on TV that we ever watch, so we only needed the one TV. What we mostly watch is movies, and both of our computers can play them, and we have a portable DVD player that our son takes to whichever room in the house he wants to be in at that time. So I'm not too surprised that in the dream, we couldnt use the TV. It would have felt like a last option anyways. As for the cell phones not working, well, that is just a fear I have. It's not something I'm constantly afraid of, but my phone is the one form of communication to my family that I always have with me, and its the one clock that I will always have. For that not to be working... that's when I really felt cut off from the world. And I am very afraid of that, because if something were to happen all the way out here in the country where we live, I would very much need that line of communication. The young birds dying in the rain is another fear we have, because it happens all too often, even to the animals in covered cages. The ground holds just enough water to ensure the animals are sufficiently soaked, and many of the smaller birds exposed to it will die without dry ground and heat. It's a very sad thing to happen, and as much as we need rain, I am afraid for quite a few of our birds because a large number of them are still very young, having just been hatched in the last few months.
I am very happy to see myself dreaming of being content to curl up with my family and just talk and hang out though. We try to get in a bit of family time before bed each day, where my husband and I sit down with both our boys and play with them, and it's adorable to see our 2 year old tickling our 2 month old. It's even more adorable for the 2 month old to get a huge smile when he does it.
I guess I dreamed of this because we have been SO dry lately, that it only seems natural to go from one extreme to another; to go from a burn ban and a drought, to a rainstorm that lasts for days, and is so thick that all signal is blocked. I still hope for rain, but now I also hope that it wont be this bad. I want a nice, long, constant rainshower that will soak everything without drowning animals, and without cutting us off from the world. I have not known a storm yet that could block my cell phone reception, and I'd not like to start now.
We haven't had rain in such a very long time, that when I woke up around what felt like 8 or so in the morning to the sound of rain outside the window, it was like music. I quickly raised the blinds to make sure it really was rain, and was delighted to see that it was indeed, and at a steady downfall at that. I was so excited that I woke up my husband to tell him the good news. He, too, was delighted at the unexpected change in weather. There was just one small problem.
We couldnt tell what time it was. Apparently, as we slept, the storm had caused a power failure. Although the power had come back on, all the clocks in the house were reset (excepting, of course, the microwave, whose clock had still not been set from the previous power outage. I'm quite lazy when it comes to setting the microwave clock). Our TV is broken, and so we have no access to any channels to see the time, and the storm was blocking our satellite reception so we also could not get online to check. Curiously enough, the storm was so thick that even our cell phones lost reception, and were still showing that it was about 1 AM (which, seeing as how we could tell it was at least morning, because the sun had clearly risen at some point, was obviously wrong). As I said previously it FELT like it was about 8 AM, but I find that often times I am off by quite a bit when it comes to guessing the time.
So, without knowing what time it was, all we had to go by was the fact that it was at least morning. As we were rising for the day, it popped into my husband's head that we might want to run outside and make sure there is nothing important out there that really shouldnt be getting wet. We threw on some clothes and boots, and ventured out into the rain, scouring the yard for any power tools or other electronics that need to come indoors. I dont remember if we found any, must not have been too important anyways, but I do remember finding birds.
In the backyard, we had a cage of young pheasants, who were none too happy to be getting soaked to their little bones. It was a carrying cage, so it was small with a wire roof (which meant nothing to shield them from the rain and wind). It was a sad sight to behold; a few of them had already died and the rest were attempting to huddle together for warmth, their feathers all matted together. My husband took the cage and found a safe home for them in a brooder, with a roof and a heat lamp, and all we could do was pray they made it through till the following morning (if they could survive the recovery, they would make it).
After securing the animals and anything that needed protection from the storm, we came back inside, only to find absolutely nothing to do. We were completely cut off from the world, really. No TV, no phones, no internet... luckily we did at least still have power. So we sat back on our bed, my sister still asleep in her room, our youngest still sleeping in his bassinet, and our toddler just waking up in our bed. The three of us laid there, just talking and gazing out the window, for quite a few hours, always checking the phones here and there to see if we had reception yet. It was a very long day, and even by the time many hours must have gone by, the sun was at the same point outside. It still looked as if it was 8 AM... like we were destined to stay cut off from the world together forever. But at least we had rain, which we desperately needed, and at least we had each other.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What it means:
Well, we do need rain very much, so it seems obvious that I'm wishing for rain. However I also know that in a really good storm, our internet goes out until the skies clear up a bit, and occasionally we even lose signal to a few TV channels (we dont have cable, so its just the 10 channels we get on the air). But yes, in actuality our TV is broken, so we cant watch anyways. And yes, we only have one TV in the house that can get any channels. We have a second TV on the backporch that works very well, except its analog and we dont have a converter box. We had a TV in the bedroom, but we turned it into a computer monitor instead since we never actually watched TV when we were in the bedroom anyways. There's only a few shows on TV that we ever watch, so we only needed the one TV. What we mostly watch is movies, and both of our computers can play them, and we have a portable DVD player that our son takes to whichever room in the house he wants to be in at that time. So I'm not too surprised that in the dream, we couldnt use the TV. It would have felt like a last option anyways. As for the cell phones not working, well, that is just a fear I have. It's not something I'm constantly afraid of, but my phone is the one form of communication to my family that I always have with me, and its the one clock that I will always have. For that not to be working... that's when I really felt cut off from the world. And I am very afraid of that, because if something were to happen all the way out here in the country where we live, I would very much need that line of communication. The young birds dying in the rain is another fear we have, because it happens all too often, even to the animals in covered cages. The ground holds just enough water to ensure the animals are sufficiently soaked, and many of the smaller birds exposed to it will die without dry ground and heat. It's a very sad thing to happen, and as much as we need rain, I am afraid for quite a few of our birds because a large number of them are still very young, having just been hatched in the last few months.
I am very happy to see myself dreaming of being content to curl up with my family and just talk and hang out though. We try to get in a bit of family time before bed each day, where my husband and I sit down with both our boys and play with them, and it's adorable to see our 2 year old tickling our 2 month old. It's even more adorable for the 2 month old to get a huge smile when he does it.
I guess I dreamed of this because we have been SO dry lately, that it only seems natural to go from one extreme to another; to go from a burn ban and a drought, to a rainstorm that lasts for days, and is so thick that all signal is blocked. I still hope for rain, but now I also hope that it wont be this bad. I want a nice, long, constant rainshower that will soak everything without drowning animals, and without cutting us off from the world. I have not known a storm yet that could block my cell phone reception, and I'd not like to start now.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Not My Guineas, Grandma!
In the dream:
We were still living in this house, but my husband's grandma was living here with us. She is the kind of person, in my opinion, that you have to walk on pins and needles around. You have to be careful of what you say and do, because much like The Godfather she is a person you do not want to piss off. Not that she would have anyone killed, but the house we are living in belongs to her and there is always the fear that she will tell us to get out. Besides, I try to be as calm and passive around my husband's family as possible, since I do not want to cause any problems between anyone and my husband, regardless of what I think about someone or a situation. It's not my place in his family.
So we're all sitting down one evening to eat dinner, and his grandma seems strangely friendly that day. She's being talkative and laughing, and we're all getting along and the mood in the room is very upbeat and light. My husband and I shared a glance, as if each asking each other what has gotten into her that she's so happy and NICE. Then I see it: she has an empty bottle of vodka on her side table. This woman was DRUNK.
So immediately I begin my paranoia trip. What did she do that made her feel the need to be too drunk to remember it, or too drunk for us to reason with her? What did she do?!
Then I start to hear them. Vehicles, helicopters... I see spotlights flashing through the windows... I just know this is her doing. I run out the back door, a spotlight blinds me and throw my arm up to block the bright lights. As I lower my arm, everything comes into view. There are black vehicles, cars and vans and jeeps. There is a crane, and they are on the other side of the barn lifting pallets of individual bird boxes over into our yard. There are people in black Mission Impossible outfits carrying various things around, a lot of them with walkie talkies and speaking in code. I see an important looking woman, and i walk over to her. What is going on?!? I'm screaming it, and freaking out.... she tells me they are here for my birds. I am out of regulation on the number of Guineas I can have per square foot on my property or something, she used big words and spoke all "official" so I'm not entirely sure what she said. I turned back to go into the house and almost ran into my husband, who tells me... "She did this... she called them because she said they were annoying her, and she couldnt sleep at night. They're here to take your guineas. I'm sorry." I don't understand because in the dream, I may have hundreds of guineas, but also in the dream, my husband has hundreds of pheasants.
When I turn back around to look out over the yard, suddenly the view changes and it's like im in someone's garage, or maybe a mechanic's car garage, and the garage door is open and the view outside is of my backyard, with special agents running around with nets, shoving guineas into individual cages and stacking them back onto the pallets. All of our birds are still roosting, despite the loud noises and lights, and it is just too easy for the agents to steal my birds right off the roosts.
I beg them, please, let me keep my birds... but no one hears me. So I ask the important looking woman, "I know you cant take them all-- how many can I keep?" Her reply: "Two."
At this point in time I must mention that they are taking away upwards of 200 guineas. In actuality I only have 9 adult birds and 72 keets. In my mind, even in the dream, I think of my 9 birds and I tell them I want to keep my purple one and a lavender. They hand me two individual bird crates, each with a very sad ruffled guinea. I stand there, tears streaming down my face, with two caged birds, and my husband standing next to me with his arm around my shoulders. Behind me, his grandma sits in a chair in the living room, rocking back and forth, and laughing quite maniacally.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What I think this means:
I think it's a combination of my fear of my husband's grandmother and my worry that my favored guineas wont make it through the heat of summer, that I will lose them. They are doing great though, the adults are free range and care for themselves, and we haven't lost a single keet yet. But why I had this dream last night, I have no idea. Scary. *shudder*
We were still living in this house, but my husband's grandma was living here with us. She is the kind of person, in my opinion, that you have to walk on pins and needles around. You have to be careful of what you say and do, because much like The Godfather she is a person you do not want to piss off. Not that she would have anyone killed, but the house we are living in belongs to her and there is always the fear that she will tell us to get out. Besides, I try to be as calm and passive around my husband's family as possible, since I do not want to cause any problems between anyone and my husband, regardless of what I think about someone or a situation. It's not my place in his family.
So we're all sitting down one evening to eat dinner, and his grandma seems strangely friendly that day. She's being talkative and laughing, and we're all getting along and the mood in the room is very upbeat and light. My husband and I shared a glance, as if each asking each other what has gotten into her that she's so happy and NICE. Then I see it: she has an empty bottle of vodka on her side table. This woman was DRUNK.
So immediately I begin my paranoia trip. What did she do that made her feel the need to be too drunk to remember it, or too drunk for us to reason with her? What did she do?!
Then I start to hear them. Vehicles, helicopters... I see spotlights flashing through the windows... I just know this is her doing. I run out the back door, a spotlight blinds me and throw my arm up to block the bright lights. As I lower my arm, everything comes into view. There are black vehicles, cars and vans and jeeps. There is a crane, and they are on the other side of the barn lifting pallets of individual bird boxes over into our yard. There are people in black Mission Impossible outfits carrying various things around, a lot of them with walkie talkies and speaking in code. I see an important looking woman, and i walk over to her. What is going on?!? I'm screaming it, and freaking out.... she tells me they are here for my birds. I am out of regulation on the number of Guineas I can have per square foot on my property or something, she used big words and spoke all "official" so I'm not entirely sure what she said. I turned back to go into the house and almost ran into my husband, who tells me... "She did this... she called them because she said they were annoying her, and she couldnt sleep at night. They're here to take your guineas. I'm sorry." I don't understand because in the dream, I may have hundreds of guineas, but also in the dream, my husband has hundreds of pheasants.
When I turn back around to look out over the yard, suddenly the view changes and it's like im in someone's garage, or maybe a mechanic's car garage, and the garage door is open and the view outside is of my backyard, with special agents running around with nets, shoving guineas into individual cages and stacking them back onto the pallets. All of our birds are still roosting, despite the loud noises and lights, and it is just too easy for the agents to steal my birds right off the roosts.
I beg them, please, let me keep my birds... but no one hears me. So I ask the important looking woman, "I know you cant take them all-- how many can I keep?" Her reply: "Two."
At this point in time I must mention that they are taking away upwards of 200 guineas. In actuality I only have 9 adult birds and 72 keets. In my mind, even in the dream, I think of my 9 birds and I tell them I want to keep my purple one and a lavender. They hand me two individual bird crates, each with a very sad ruffled guinea. I stand there, tears streaming down my face, with two caged birds, and my husband standing next to me with his arm around my shoulders. Behind me, his grandma sits in a chair in the living room, rocking back and forth, and laughing quite maniacally.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
What I think this means:
I think it's a combination of my fear of my husband's grandmother and my worry that my favored guineas wont make it through the heat of summer, that I will lose them. They are doing great though, the adults are free range and care for themselves, and we haven't lost a single keet yet. But why I had this dream last night, I have no idea. Scary. *shudder*
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
The Storm Approaches
Last night's dream must have been a foretelling; there is no other explanation. However, for you to understand why I believe this to be true, I must first give you a brief summary of what is going on in my life at this time.
My dad and stepmother are in the process of divorcing. Regardless of who is living where and who gets along with who, my husband will be leaving today to pick up my younger sister from Florida. Yesterday, my stepmother wrote to me that unless certain plans were laid out within the next 24 hours of her letter, my sister would not be able to go at all. Those were the exact words I had been dreading for the past 6 months; that somehow someone would tell me that I could not see my sister. I thought that because it was so close to the time we would pick her up, that there was no way they could possibly take her visit away from me, and yet they tried. So we laid out those plans, but now I am in constant fear that somehow at the very last minute they will tell me once again that I can not see her. This is where my dream comes in.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I dreamed that it was today; that my husband was all packed and ready to go to to Florida. He would be taking our 2 year old with him for the trip to go pick up my sister. Not 20 minutes before he was about to head out the door, my stepmother calls and tells me "I'm sorry, and I dont know how else to say this than to just say it, but your sister can't come out there. You have a tornado heading straight for your house, and I don't want her out there with that." I was angry at first, because how would she know if we were about to get a tornado? So I checked the weather channel and there was indeed a tornado. There were actually 2, but one was actually heading away from us. The other, however, was aimed for our door and moving fast. We quickly gathered what important items we needed (a small folder of important documents and 3 stuffed animals) and began bagging food, drinks, blankets, and flashlights, and taking them to a small round metal building we have on the side of the house (we are actually using this building as a brooder for pheasant chicks, but at this exact moment in time we didnt mind sharing the space). We had everything ready and together to wait out the storm and pray for our safety, and we each grabbed one of our 2 kids and locked ourselves in the round room.
As the storm approached, the sky darkened. Everything seemed to be a shade of brown coated in sunlight, even though the sky was growing darker by the minute. It was becoming windy, and small rocks, dirt, and debris began swirling by with the gusts. I was lying down, holding my 2 month old tight, and I kept switching between squeezing my 2 month old and my 2 year old. Should the storm be strong enough to lift that building off of us, I did not want to lose either of my children. We suddenly heard someone talking, and when we opened the door to the room, there were a few people looking to buy birds. We knew the storm was approaching fast, but my husband went out and began showing them our flock and brooders. While he was talking business, I looked back towards the house and saw my mom approaching me. She was worried for the boys too, so she decided to come over and make sure we were alright. When my husband was done selling a few animals, we looked to the sky saw the storm. It was huge, and it was almost to us. So we all huddled together in the round building: myself, my husband, my mom, and my 2 boys. We braced ourselves...
And I woke up.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
With the divorce going on, and some issues we're having with my husband's family, it is obvious that a storm approaches. We have secluded ourselves, and are ready to brace for impact. But why was it important that we sell some birds first? What does that symbolize? Why would my stepmother try to stop me from seeing my sister? Why was my mom there, when she lives halfway across the country? What was the storm that is moving away from us, and why must another one hit so soon?
My dad and stepmother are in the process of divorcing. Regardless of who is living where and who gets along with who, my husband will be leaving today to pick up my younger sister from Florida. Yesterday, my stepmother wrote to me that unless certain plans were laid out within the next 24 hours of her letter, my sister would not be able to go at all. Those were the exact words I had been dreading for the past 6 months; that somehow someone would tell me that I could not see my sister. I thought that because it was so close to the time we would pick her up, that there was no way they could possibly take her visit away from me, and yet they tried. So we laid out those plans, but now I am in constant fear that somehow at the very last minute they will tell me once again that I can not see her. This is where my dream comes in.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I dreamed that it was today; that my husband was all packed and ready to go to to Florida. He would be taking our 2 year old with him for the trip to go pick up my sister. Not 20 minutes before he was about to head out the door, my stepmother calls and tells me "I'm sorry, and I dont know how else to say this than to just say it, but your sister can't come out there. You have a tornado heading straight for your house, and I don't want her out there with that." I was angry at first, because how would she know if we were about to get a tornado? So I checked the weather channel and there was indeed a tornado. There were actually 2, but one was actually heading away from us. The other, however, was aimed for our door and moving fast. We quickly gathered what important items we needed (a small folder of important documents and 3 stuffed animals) and began bagging food, drinks, blankets, and flashlights, and taking them to a small round metal building we have on the side of the house (we are actually using this building as a brooder for pheasant chicks, but at this exact moment in time we didnt mind sharing the space). We had everything ready and together to wait out the storm and pray for our safety, and we each grabbed one of our 2 kids and locked ourselves in the round room.
As the storm approached, the sky darkened. Everything seemed to be a shade of brown coated in sunlight, even though the sky was growing darker by the minute. It was becoming windy, and small rocks, dirt, and debris began swirling by with the gusts. I was lying down, holding my 2 month old tight, and I kept switching between squeezing my 2 month old and my 2 year old. Should the storm be strong enough to lift that building off of us, I did not want to lose either of my children. We suddenly heard someone talking, and when we opened the door to the room, there were a few people looking to buy birds. We knew the storm was approaching fast, but my husband went out and began showing them our flock and brooders. While he was talking business, I looked back towards the house and saw my mom approaching me. She was worried for the boys too, so she decided to come over and make sure we were alright. When my husband was done selling a few animals, we looked to the sky saw the storm. It was huge, and it was almost to us. So we all huddled together in the round building: myself, my husband, my mom, and my 2 boys. We braced ourselves...
And I woke up.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
With the divorce going on, and some issues we're having with my husband's family, it is obvious that a storm approaches. We have secluded ourselves, and are ready to brace for impact. But why was it important that we sell some birds first? What does that symbolize? Why would my stepmother try to stop me from seeing my sister? Why was my mom there, when she lives halfway across the country? What was the storm that is moving away from us, and why must another one hit so soon?
Friday, May 13, 2011
Pediatric Fish Store?
In the dream, I was taking my older son to his pediatrician, Dr. Clark (sorry, no first names on this one). Apparently, the pediatrics department is also a fish store. When my car pulled up to the building, I wasn't quite clear as to whether or not I had taken my son there for the doctor or the fish. Either way, we got out of the car and began heading for the door. Along the way, we noticed lots of other kids playing in a large front yard, and my son eagerly ran to join them. I noticed a wasp flying nearby, and in fear for my son, I ran over, grabbed him, and moved him to a safer location by a sandbox. About that time, I felt something nudge my back. I turn around... and it's my billy goat! Unfortunately, something is seriously wrong with him... he's dead. As a matter of fact, he's a zombie goat. And he keeps trying to eat my shirt! I shoo him away, and tell myself it's about time to go inside. So I take my son by the hand, and we walk into the pediatric fish store.
After walking inside, Dr. Clark greets us and tells us he'll be with us momentarily. While sitting in one of the two waiting rooms, I glance up at the television and it reminds me: the series finale of Smallville is about to come on! I dont know WHAT I was thinking going out at this time of day, when such an important episode is coming on! I quickly checked my watch, and saw that I had about 10 minutes before it started. I flipped through the channels on the television, and soon realized that this particular TV set didn't receive the required channel. I walked over to the next waiting room, and flipped through the channels on the television in that room, and after much searching finally found the right channel. Checking my watch again, I had 5 minutes left before the show started. At that moment, Dr. Clark walks up and begins talking to my son. So I left the two of them there for a just a minute, so that I could run to my car and get some snacks that I always carry in the diaper bag. I originally planned on buying Pizza Hut for dinner as a special meal with the finale episode, but with only 5 minutes till showtime, I just didnt have the time to wait for the pizza (although ironically, Pizza Hut was right next door to the pediatric fish store).
Upon reentering the building, with just a few minutes left on the current show, I shared some small talk with the nurses standing around the front desk. I decided it was time to go sit and prepare for the start of the episode, and as I walked toward the couch I noticed that Dr. Clark had fallen asleep. I tried to very carefully and quietly sit on the end seat, but he woke up anyways. I apologized for waking him, and he said it alright; he didnt want to miss Smallville anyways. The show started, and my son and I spent the entire 2 hour finale watching it with the doctor.
When the amazing show was officially over (even the end credits) I wiped the tears from my eyes and stood up to stretch. It was an amazing and emotional episode; a fitting ending to a perfect show. Of course, because it was dream, I have NO idea exactly what happened in that episode. I walked around the room to stretch my legs out and get some exercise and enjoyed spending an hour or so watching people buy fish. Eventually, it was time to leave. Something big was happening outside of the store, though I'm not sure what it was, but everyone was heading for the doors at the same time (no rush though, calmly walking). Just as I was about to walk out the door myself, I remembered that I forgot something back inside. I saw someone pick up my little boy (probably his doctor, though I didnt see his face) and I knew that he would be safe. I ran farther back inside, grabbed whatever it was that I left behind, and went back towards the exit. I walked out the door and over to my car, where my son and his doctor stood waiting for me. It was at that moment that I began laughing, as I had just realized that my doctor and superman both had something in common: they were both "Clark"! Then my phone rang, and I was awake.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I dont think this dream means anything specific as an entire dream, but I know why some of the things in it were present. The fish store was there because I recently noticed that one of my fish is missing from the tank... no dead little fishie body, no pieces of fish... just missing entirely. My son because I'm with him all day. The wasp because it's summer and I've seen a lot lately, and I'm terrified of flying stinging biting insects. The series finale of Smallville is actually coming on TONIGHT in about two hours, and I plan on having Pizza Hut and snacks for a little "farewell" party to young Clark Kent. My goat was there because unfortunately, he died just two days ago. The first TV didnt have the right channel because the TV in the hospital didnt get that channel when I went into labor with my second son (though I'm not sure where he was for this dream... probably spending time with his daddy. You know, in dream world.). But why on Earth was Dr. Clark there?! Just because of the "Clark/Clark Kent" similarity? Maybe it's because the doctor actually bears some resemblance to the caped hero? And as a doctor, saves lives as well? I have NO clue.
After walking inside, Dr. Clark greets us and tells us he'll be with us momentarily. While sitting in one of the two waiting rooms, I glance up at the television and it reminds me: the series finale of Smallville is about to come on! I dont know WHAT I was thinking going out at this time of day, when such an important episode is coming on! I quickly checked my watch, and saw that I had about 10 minutes before it started. I flipped through the channels on the television, and soon realized that this particular TV set didn't receive the required channel. I walked over to the next waiting room, and flipped through the channels on the television in that room, and after much searching finally found the right channel. Checking my watch again, I had 5 minutes left before the show started. At that moment, Dr. Clark walks up and begins talking to my son. So I left the two of them there for a just a minute, so that I could run to my car and get some snacks that I always carry in the diaper bag. I originally planned on buying Pizza Hut for dinner as a special meal with the finale episode, but with only 5 minutes till showtime, I just didnt have the time to wait for the pizza (although ironically, Pizza Hut was right next door to the pediatric fish store).
Upon reentering the building, with just a few minutes left on the current show, I shared some small talk with the nurses standing around the front desk. I decided it was time to go sit and prepare for the start of the episode, and as I walked toward the couch I noticed that Dr. Clark had fallen asleep. I tried to very carefully and quietly sit on the end seat, but he woke up anyways. I apologized for waking him, and he said it alright; he didnt want to miss Smallville anyways. The show started, and my son and I spent the entire 2 hour finale watching it with the doctor.
When the amazing show was officially over (even the end credits) I wiped the tears from my eyes and stood up to stretch. It was an amazing and emotional episode; a fitting ending to a perfect show. Of course, because it was dream, I have NO idea exactly what happened in that episode. I walked around the room to stretch my legs out and get some exercise and enjoyed spending an hour or so watching people buy fish. Eventually, it was time to leave. Something big was happening outside of the store, though I'm not sure what it was, but everyone was heading for the doors at the same time (no rush though, calmly walking). Just as I was about to walk out the door myself, I remembered that I forgot something back inside. I saw someone pick up my little boy (probably his doctor, though I didnt see his face) and I knew that he would be safe. I ran farther back inside, grabbed whatever it was that I left behind, and went back towards the exit. I walked out the door and over to my car, where my son and his doctor stood waiting for me. It was at that moment that I began laughing, as I had just realized that my doctor and superman both had something in common: they were both "Clark"! Then my phone rang, and I was awake.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I dont think this dream means anything specific as an entire dream, but I know why some of the things in it were present. The fish store was there because I recently noticed that one of my fish is missing from the tank... no dead little fishie body, no pieces of fish... just missing entirely. My son because I'm with him all day. The wasp because it's summer and I've seen a lot lately, and I'm terrified of flying stinging biting insects. The series finale of Smallville is actually coming on TONIGHT in about two hours, and I plan on having Pizza Hut and snacks for a little "farewell" party to young Clark Kent. My goat was there because unfortunately, he died just two days ago. The first TV didnt have the right channel because the TV in the hospital didnt get that channel when I went into labor with my second son (though I'm not sure where he was for this dream... probably spending time with his daddy. You know, in dream world.). But why on Earth was Dr. Clark there?! Just because of the "Clark/Clark Kent" similarity? Maybe it's because the doctor actually bears some resemblance to the caped hero? And as a doctor, saves lives as well? I have NO clue.
My Sleeping Journey
I think that our dreams are adventures. Adventures we undertake while we sleep. I find myself on the strangest paths in my dreams, and I felt the need to share this journey with all of you. So this blog is where I will post my dreams, my adventures, and you can join me in discovering exactly where it is my mind goes at night. At the bottom of each post, I will write a short piece about why I think I had that dream, or what it means to me... just a small brainstorm about it. But PLEASE, comment. Tell me what you think it means; or tell me about a dream journey you took. If I get a comment or email about an especially interesting dream that someone had that caught my attention, I might even post it on the blog! Sweet dreams, and have a safe journey!
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