My dreams take me to the wierdest places—sometimes good, sometimes bad—but there are some of them I just don't want to forget. So good or bad, they go here. My dreams take me on a journey into the farthest parts of my mind. If I can figure out what they mean, maybe I can understand myself a bit better. You are more than welcome to take this journey with me, but don't judge what you read. Remember, it was just a dream.

That said, a lot of these dreams have at least one part of them that would be great in a story. Some of them would make amazing stories all on their own, so I do get a lot of writing inspiration from these pages. Maybe one day you'll read one of my stories and know exactly which dream inspired it!

Friday, July 22, 2011

The Cons of Rain

In the Dream:

We haven't had rain in such a very long time, that when I woke up around what felt like 8 or so in the morning to the sound of rain outside the window, it was like music. I quickly raised the blinds to make sure it really was rain, and was delighted to see that it was indeed, and at a steady downfall at that. I was so excited that I woke up my husband to tell him the good news. He, too, was delighted at the unexpected change in weather. There was just one small problem.

We couldnt tell what time it was. Apparently, as we slept, the storm had caused a power failure. Although the power had come back on, all the clocks in the house were reset (excepting, of course, the microwave, whose clock had still not been set from the previous power outage. I'm quite lazy when it comes to setting the microwave clock). Our TV is broken, and so we have no access to any channels to see the time, and the storm was blocking our satellite reception so we also could not get online to check. Curiously enough, the storm was so thick that even our cell phones lost reception, and were still showing that it was about 1 AM (which, seeing as how we could tell it was at least morning, because the sun had clearly risen at some point, was obviously wrong). As I said previously it FELT like it was about 8 AM, but I find that often times I am off by quite a bit when it comes to guessing the time.

So, without knowing what time it was, all we had to go by was the fact that it was at least morning. As we were rising for the day, it popped into my husband's head that we might want to run outside and make sure there is nothing important out there that really shouldnt be getting wet. We threw on some clothes and boots, and ventured out into the rain, scouring the yard for any power tools or other electronics that need to come indoors. I dont remember if we found any, must not have been too important anyways, but I do remember finding birds.

In the backyard, we had a cage of young pheasants, who were none too happy to be getting soaked to their little bones.  It was a carrying cage, so it was small with a wire roof (which meant nothing to shield them from the rain and wind). It was a sad sight to behold; a few of them had already died and the rest were attempting to huddle together for warmth, their feathers all matted together. My husband took the cage and found a safe home for them in a brooder, with a roof and a heat lamp, and all we could do was pray they made it through till the following morning (if they could survive the recovery, they would make it).

After securing the animals and anything that needed protection from the storm, we came back inside, only to find absolutely nothing to do. We were completely cut off from the world, really. No TV, no phones, no internet... luckily we did at least still have power. So we sat back on our bed, my sister still asleep in her room, our youngest still sleeping in his bassinet, and our toddler just waking up in our bed. The three of us laid there, just talking and gazing out the window, for quite a few hours, always checking the phones here and there to see if we had reception yet. It was a very long day, and even by the time many hours must have gone by, the sun was at the same point outside. It still looked as if it was 8 AM... like we were destined to stay cut off from the world together forever. But at least we had rain, which we desperately needed, and at least we had each other.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

What it means:

Well, we do need rain very much, so it seems obvious that I'm wishing for rain. However I also know that in a really good storm, our internet goes out until the skies clear up a bit, and occasionally we even lose signal to a few TV channels (we dont have cable, so its just the 10 channels we get on the air). But yes, in actuality our TV is broken, so we cant watch anyways. And yes, we only have one TV in the house that can get any channels. We have a second TV on the backporch that works very well, except its analog and we dont have a converter box. We had a TV in the bedroom, but we turned it into a computer monitor instead since we never actually watched TV when we were in the bedroom anyways. There's only a few shows on TV that we ever watch, so we only needed the one TV. What we mostly watch is movies, and both of our computers can play them, and we have a portable DVD player that our son takes to whichever room in the house he wants to be in at that time. So I'm not too surprised that in the dream, we couldnt use the TV. It would have felt like a last option anyways. As for the cell phones not working, well, that is just a fear I have. It's not something I'm constantly afraid of, but my phone is the one form of communication to my family that I always have with me, and its the one clock that I will always have. For that not to be working... that's when I really felt cut off from the world. And I am very afraid of that, because if something were to happen all the way out here in the country where we live, I would very much need that line of communication. The young birds dying in the rain is another fear we have, because it happens all too often, even to the animals in covered cages. The ground holds just enough water to ensure the animals are sufficiently soaked, and many of the smaller birds exposed to it will die without dry ground and heat. It's a very sad thing to happen, and as much as we need rain, I am afraid for quite a few of our birds because a large number of them are still very young, having just been hatched in the last few months.

I am very happy to see myself dreaming of being content to curl up with my family and just talk and hang out though. We try to get in a bit of family time before bed each day, where my husband and I sit down with both our boys and play with them, and it's adorable to see our 2 year old tickling our 2 month old. It's even more adorable for the 2 month old to get a huge smile when he does it.

I guess I dreamed of this because we have been SO dry lately, that it only seems natural to go from one extreme to another; to go from a burn ban and a drought, to a rainstorm that lasts for days, and is so thick that all signal is blocked. I still hope for rain, but now I also hope that it wont be this bad. I want a nice, long, constant rainshower that will soak everything without drowning animals, and without cutting us off from the world. I have not known a storm yet that could block my cell phone reception, and I'd not like to start now.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Not My Guineas, Grandma!

In the dream:

We were still living in this house, but my husband's grandma was living here with us. She is the kind of person, in my opinion, that you have to walk on pins and needles around. You have to be careful of what you say and do, because much like The Godfather she is a person you do not want to piss off. Not that she would have anyone killed, but the house we are living in belongs to her and there is always the fear that she will tell us to get out. Besides, I try to be as calm and passive around my husband's family as possible, since I do not want to cause any problems between anyone and my husband, regardless of what I think about someone or a situation. It's not my place in his family.

So we're all sitting down one evening to eat dinner, and his grandma seems strangely friendly that day. She's being talkative and laughing, and we're all getting along and the mood in the room is very upbeat and light. My husband and I shared a glance, as if each asking each other what has gotten into her that she's so happy and NICE. Then I see it: she has an empty bottle of vodka on her side table. This woman was DRUNK.

So immediately I begin my paranoia trip. What did she do that made her feel the need to be too drunk to remember it, or too drunk for us to reason with her? What did she do?!

Then I start to hear them. Vehicles, helicopters... I see spotlights flashing through the windows... I just know this is her doing. I run out the back door, a spotlight blinds me and throw my arm up to block the bright lights. As I lower my arm, everything comes into view. There are black vehicles, cars and vans and jeeps. There is a crane, and they are on the other side of the barn lifting pallets of individual bird boxes over into our yard. There are people in black Mission Impossible outfits carrying various things around, a lot of them with walkie talkies and speaking in code. I see an important looking woman, and i walk over to her. What is going on?!? I'm screaming it, and freaking out.... she tells me they are here for my birds. I am out of regulation on the number of Guineas I can have per square foot on my property or something, she used big words and spoke all "official" so I'm not entirely sure what she said. I turned back to go into the house and almost ran into my husband, who tells me... "She did this... she called them because she said they were annoying her, and she couldnt sleep at night. They're here to take your guineas. I'm sorry." I don't understand because in the dream, I may have hundreds of guineas, but also in the dream, my husband has hundreds of pheasants.

When I turn back around to look out over the yard, suddenly the view changes and it's like im in someone's garage, or maybe a mechanic's car garage, and the garage door is open and the view outside is of my backyard, with special agents running around with nets, shoving guineas into individual cages and stacking them back onto the pallets. All of our birds are still roosting, despite the loud noises and lights, and it is just too easy for the agents to steal my birds right off the roosts.

I beg them, please, let me keep my birds... but no one hears me. So I ask the important looking woman, "I know you cant take them all-- how many can I keep?" Her reply: "Two."

At this point in time I must mention that they are taking away upwards of 200 guineas. In actuality I only have 9 adult birds and 72 keets. In my mind, even in the dream, I think of my 9 birds and I tell them I want to keep my purple one and a lavender. They hand me two individual bird crates, each with a very sad ruffled guinea. I stand there, tears streaming down my face, with two caged birds, and my husband standing next to me with his arm around my shoulders. Behind me, his grandma sits in a chair in the living room, rocking back and forth, and laughing quite maniacally.


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

What I think this means:

I think it's a combination of my fear of my husband's grandmother and my worry that my favored guineas wont make it through the heat of summer, that I will lose them. They are doing great though, the adults are free range and care for themselves, and we haven't lost a single keet yet. But why I had this dream last night, I have no idea. Scary. *shudder*

Loving a Techie Genius Con Artist

In this dream, the techie man I had been so in love with looked and sounded exactly like Alec Steele, the blacksmith. It was pretty amazing....