In the dream, I was in two places.
In the Military
At one point I was military again, walking with a group of others through a clearing in the woods, but I knew we were close to a building of some sort. Most of the people there were in a uniform of some kind, but it seemed to be overly casual, with shirts unbuttoned, undershirts untucked, some people wearing working blue pants with camouflage jackets. Some of those uniforms aren't even worn anymore. We were all different ranks, too. I was having a conversation with a Master Chief, and although the setting was all much too casual as it was, there were still uniforms involved, so a Master Chief really shouldn't have been carrying on such a laid back conversation with a third class Petty Officer.
I don't recall what the conversation was about, or what his question was, but I knew it had something to do with clothes. Something along the lines of how many layers of clothing people wear or something. All I know for sure is that I began showing him just how much I was wearing, to prove my point. I pulled up the collars on a white undershirt, my blue button-up work shirt, and a long sleeved green shirt, then I put back on a short sleeved black shirt I had in my hand and ended with my work jacket. He laughed, and commented on how people actually wear that much and how overprepared they were (I have no idea what that meant).
While laughing he tossed his arm around my shoulders and led me toward the larger group of people standing around, and started exclaiming out loud how I was an example of what people ought to be doing, and all the while all I could think about was that he was a Master Chief and I was just ET3, he shouldn't have put his arm around me at all. Especially in uniform. Was he going to get in trouble? Was I? It was one of those boundaries that you do not cross in uniform. You can be friends off base, out of uniform, but physical contact in uniform made me so nervous. I was glad to be such a role model for others, and it pays to be well-liked by your chain of command, but still...
The group all started heading down a pathway toward the building, Master Chief dropping his arm from my shoulder but staying next to me. No one else wanted to come near me, it was like they were afraid now. But why? What did I do? ....I felt as if I was "owned" now. Which also meant that I was alone now.
~~~~~~
In the Classroom
At another point, I was walking into a classroom. I thought I recognized a few faced from high school, but when I looked directly at them, they seemed to blur and fade, as if they weren't the same people, but I was supposed to be under the impression that it was, in fact, high school. The teacher wasn't there, it was someone else, and they were handing us all sheets of paper. The classroom had been reorganized, and the desks were spread out in an odd design, Some turned this way and that, some lined up, and some set aside. The papers we were handed had a map of the desks, and we were told to "find our seats". Although everyone had their name labeled on a desk on the map, the map had no clear markings to show which was was the front of the classroom, and the pattern that the desks were laid out in was very hard to determine. Too many similarities when you turned the map.
Some people didn't have a problem finding their seats, and they sat down immediately with barely a glimpse at their map. Some people struggled a bit, but once they sat down they looked relieved and knew they were in the right spot. A few people sat down, and after interacting with those around them, got up and moved, eventually finding the right seat after two or three attempts. Everyone ended up seeming to be happy with those who sat near them or who they sat facing, a few people were nervous about those who sat behind them and a few people seemed to be longing to be closer to people on the other side of the room.
I knew I wasn't the last one standing at this point, people were still coming into the classroom and getting their maps, but I did seem to be struggling the most. Part of it was that I was afraid to sit down and then find out I was wrong. The entire class would watch me stand up and relocate, and I didn't want them watching me and judging me.
I tried looking at my map and comparing where people were sitting to where my name was, to help me find my place, but the names just blurred. My name was the only one that I could read clearly, which was frustrating. I did eventually sit down at an empty desk; there were quite a few empty desks, I suppose each of them could have been my desk but I thought this one just seemed to fit the map. After trying to get settled in, someone was telling me that it wasn't my seat. I reassessed the map and saw another empty seat that did seem to fit the map quite well. I went over there instead, and settling in was a little bit more easy this time. The instructor shut the classroom door and began his lecture. He was pacing around the room, looking at where people were and making mental notes of it (you could tell he was thinking deeply). I don't know what his lecture was about, I couldn't hear him.
After a while, he handed out a test. It was rolled up at first, I couldn't see what it was or what it was about, but as I began to unroll it I knew it was hard. I started working on it, though I'm not sure what it was about either. It was blurry to me, though in the dream I think I could read it. I was struggling, and people in the classroom began to talk loudly. They were talking to each other, some yelling, some crying, some whispering. The instructor kept trying to calm them down and tell them to be quiet, it was a test, but he didn't do anything to physically stop anyone, and he didn't raise his voice. He just kept reminding us that it was test. I was failing mine, I could tell. It was so hard! And everyone around me was being so loud... Some of the people were getting through their tests like it was nothing. Some of them were talking and interacting with those around them, and it seemed to help them, because they did show progress on their tests. I just couldn't do it. Someone behind me whispered to me that they think I was supposed to be in a different seat, and I looked around the room and saw another seat open.
I went to the other seat. In front of the entire class, in the middle of a test, I got up and took the walk of shame to the other side of the room and sat down in an empty seat. There were lots of other people around this seat, but I was still faced in a direction that I could turn and talk to the people if I wanted to, yet I could still be alone and to myself as well. I looked down at my test and it was just a blank sheet of paper now.
I could see people glancing at me, I could hear people whispering, but I didn't care. I think I found my seat. The instructor at least seemed pleased.
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