He was an older gentleman, easily in his fifties, with hard lines across his face that told of the stress and work he had put into the life and status he had built for himself. I can't say he wasn't handsome in his own way, though the thought of having any physical contact had haunted me for the past few hours. But, I knew it was inevitable. It had to happen. Lives depended on it.
I had no knowledge of who I worked for, let alone whose lives were at stake. All I knew for certain was that gaining the yakuza's trust was vital and that the fastest way to a man's heart is between someone else's legs. Today, those legs would have to be mine.
Harmless flirting ensued, carefully concealed among social conversations with other crime syndicate leaders. It was nice not having to hide my constant staring, though I did have to keep my lips curled upward to hide my growing disgust. I'd never had to talk myself into sleeping with someone before, and mentally noting his positive traits wasn't making a difference. His hands looked rough, his eyes looked cold, and his demeanor showed that he wasn't interested anyway.
In some way, I feel like he was told to seduce me as well. The idea rolled around in my head, and I laughed to myself at the thought that we were both talking ourselves into this act of trickery that neither cared for. We might as well have talked to each other and decided on a bunch of facts we'd feel comfortable pretending to have weaseled out of each other just to keep our clothes on. Of course, he never said anything, and I wouldn't either, so the slow dance to the inevitable continued.
When I suggested we retire to my bedroom to relax with a movie, he acted as if he had expected it. He simply nodded and excused himself from everyone else, and he even led me into my own room.
I was terrified.
He removed his jacket and laid down on his side, propping his head in his hand with his elbow. I must have looked more awkward than a literal elephant in a room as I tried to lay down beside him. I shuddered every time my leg brushed the comforter just knowing what I had to do. Finally I crawled up in front of him and laid down the same way, but with my head lying in my elbow instead of propped up. We were still inches apart; I couldn't bring myself to press up against him or even get close enough to touch. My skin crawled, not only with the idea of touching this man but also with the fear that my husband would walk in at any moment. Apparently he wasn't privy to the life-or-death situation. I stared at the TV, wondering if I could just continue with the fake plan of watching a movie and perhaps even find a more innocent position should someone stumble into the room and catch us alone.
My thoughts were interrupted when the yakuza boss rose from the bed and rushed out the door. I was alarmed, for sure, but I was also immensely relieved. He came back in carrying a cup of water, in a slightly less rush, and rummaged through a black bag on my dresser. Pulling out a small pill bottle, he removed a few and popped them into his mouth, chasing them with the water.
My heart and mind raced to conclusions, reaching the same one at the same time. Did he just take a Viagra? Is he preparing for this to actually happen? How long do those pills take to kick in, how long do they last for, and is he expecting to enact this for the entire duration? What did I get myself into?!
My face must have revealed my worries, because he held up a hand and tilted his head, as if putting me at ease. "No," he explained, "this is not what you think it is."
And it wasn't. It really, really wasn't. Apparently, as he showed me, it was a stool softener his doctor had prescribed him because his stomach had been hurting lately.
I'm not sure if I was more embarrassed for him for having to tell a stranger about his bowel issues, or for me for the fact that I had brought him into my bedroom when he would have preferred to be in my bathroom, or perhaps for the both of us for letting it get as far as it had. Either way, I was grateful that my legs were not the path to his heart today after all, and with so much mystery gone between us already, I doubted it would ever lead to his heart. Someone else would have to seduce him now, and I couldn't help but giggle with relief.
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